Pills.

What is going on with this shit?

I mean really.

Listening to commercials pushing all the various pills and drugs that’ll make our lives better and more hopeful and then catching the lawyerly disclaimers slurred in messily at the end, I had to wonder.

Do guys really neeeeeed Viagra?

And it’s not like the thought snagged an underlying need or want, or anything.

It’s just that I’ve never ever even dreamed of needing anything even remotely like Viagra. I mean, c’mon, what dudes are having a problem with THAT? What the fuck has happened to men?

Puuuuullllllllllleeeeeeeezzzzze.

But, ya know what, if by some odd happenstance, I was, I don’t know, somehow crippled by sissiness? The commercials for That Pill make me laugh out loud.

“Check with your doctor to be sure your heart can handle it.”

What guy’s heart can’t handle it? What guy would worry about something as trivial as a heart attack when he’s gettin’ it? Are you kidding me? What has happened to men?

“You may experience blurred vision”

Um. So who cares?

“If you experience an erection lasting longer than four hours you may want to seek medical help”.

You’re kiddin’, right? I’d be livin’ LARGE. That just sounds like Miss Carol’s gonna be a little bit sorely happy tomorrow.

So yeah, I don’t get it.

But then again, maybe I’m living on the periphery.

Maybe I’m not seeing the whole picture.