So I was watching House Hunters International last night and this amazingly obnoxious couple was looking for a vacation home in Roatan, Honduras.
Moving from house to house and clutching their clipboards like shields they tallied ambiguities. They’d devised an absurdly numbered rating scheme to help them choose their vacation home and as I watched and listened to these nerdy number oriented turds apply numerical values to beach and ocean, slowly squeezing all the fun out, I slowly got pissed.
How dare they?
Ya know what?
If you feel you can somehow quantify and qualify your idea of island life then maybe you don’t belong, maybe this lifestyle ain’t for you. Maybe you should stay in your land-locked hellhole and spend your life making lists and ratings and numerical rankings for all the silly shit in your life.
I gotta stop watching TV.