I’m your Santy.

So this is what happened.

Me and my beard took the big truck to PPCY (Pinners Point Container Yard) to drop an empty container. PPCY is where the lonely empties go when the shipping companies don’t want them or need them on their ships.

So I pulled in, got the empty inspected, got my paperwork, and was told which row to go to.

And while I sat waiting, one of the spotter trucks pulled up next to me. She was young and cute and smiling.

The spotters do the selecting and directing for the massive overhead forklifts that handle the containers coming off of, and being put on, our trucks.

I slid my window down and she said- Hi!

And then she said- You should be a Santa Claus!

And then she said- Not only do you have the beard, you have the crinkly eyes! And she smiled cutely.

So I thought briefly, very briefly, about dressing up as a Santa and enduring dozens of little kids.

So instead, staring down at her boobs-

I said- You’re right! Let me practice!

I said- HO HO HO, little girl! Would you like to sit on Santy’s lap? HO HO HO!

I said- Santy would really loooove you on his lap little girl! HO HO HO!

She looked up at me for a minute more, her smile gone, and said- hmmmm, maybe not so much.

And rolled up her window and drove away.

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